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Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Comments

mp

I've never heard of this family, but I think the number of kids is up to the people raising them. And if they're committed to actually caring for, loving and RAISING them, then more power to them. My brother-in-law is from a family of 12, and that worked out just fine - all college-educated and productive, healthy people. His parents WANTED a big family and made the choices along the way that supported that decision. In large families the older kids definitely have a big hand in helping out with the younger ones. Which, depending on the kid, might create some resentment or they might whole-heartedly embrace taking care of their sibs.

I'm from a family of 4 kids, which felt on the bigger side growing up, but I really like having that many siblings (all sisters). I WISH I was up to the challenge of having a "big" family, but I know myself enough to know that I'm just not the mother of a big family. My choice, not my circumstance. I'm not a religious person - consider myself agnostic at best - more of a humanist viewpoint - so it's frustrating for me to hear of people putting these types of decisions into "gods hands" and completely taking themselves out of the equation when they are the ones who will have to raise the child. I think the decision to have 0-17+ kids should reside solely in the hands of the prospective parents and leave "god" out of it. I'm limiting myself to 2 kids because that is the best choice for me and my family. I'm sure I could have more kids, but I know myself well enough to know more kids would take a heavy toll on me and my parenting. And we didn't limit our kids so we could have better cars or a better house. It does have to do with being able to adequately support them and provide for their education on one income, however. I stay home with them so we live on one salary. And by not having a gaggle of kids we're able to give the ones we do have better opportunities - for education, for travel, for lots of stuff. Not to mention being able to eventually add back some element of a professional life for myself once my kids are older vs. constantly creating more babies. But that is OUR personal choice, and I certainly don't advocate that my way is the best or only way. I only advocate that people make their own choices and then make the best of it. When it comes to kids, failure is not an option. So, you must set yourself up to succeed. What defines success is completely individual. For some, that means no kids. For others, 17 feels right.

I do have to ask, however, how old this woman is having her 17th baby? Because there comes a point when the child is more likely than not to have various genetic misfortunes and/or birth defects, etc. Not to say you shouldn't have a disabled child, but if you have 16 healthy ones, why push your luck? Even religious people who are opposed to birth control know how to prevent conception.... my parents had friends who had a boat-load of kids and it sure didn't end up a happy family. The older kids resented the responsibilities put on them, the restrictions, and lack of freedom and ability to do things like college. The mom kept having babies, the youngest of whom was born when she was well into her 40's and had Down's Syndrome. My sister and I agree that this, while sad in a way, means that now this lady can finally stop having babies because with this child, she'll ALWAYS have one at home vs. the others who couldn't get out of there fast enough. Mission accomplished.

Rachael

I don't think she's selfish for having the kids, I think she is selfish for isolating them from the world. They are like some sort of weird polygamist clan. No TV, video games, home schooling, and only being allowed to hang out with their brothers and sisters? Yeah, those girls are not going to have a clue when they leave the house.
I also think its wrong to have kids and then allow your older children to raise them. She uses the "buddy" system. as soon as she stops breastfeeding she makes another child care for the baby. How is that fair? How was it their choice for their parents to keep having kids?
so I have to disagree with you on a lot. Especially since to me it sometimes seems they are having kid after kid to make the news. Discovery channel paid to help finish their house.
I don't agree with God only giving you what you were meant to have. We have free agency.

Aunt Christy

Entirely depends on who is having them...

Shelly

If the children are well taken care of, not a problem. I am in awe of them for raising such a brood. Many parents can't even raise one child, let alone 17! I came from a big family and wanted a big family, which many consider 4 to be these days.

Dawn

It's not selfish or irresponsible at all. Christian families are now just waking up out from the feminist fog and realizing they have been misguided by all the garbage being poured in their minds and are going back to the Word of God for answers. They are letting God be in charge of everything including their fertility. Praise God for that! Fertility is a gift for us ladies and it won't be long till it's just not there anymore.
I think it's selfish to limit children or just not have them for the sake of what? An education? Better cars? Better house? Vacations? Please...
God knows the exact amount of children to give each and every one of us. Some He only gives 2 or 5, or none. It's all about giving Him the reigns.
The world has a mentality of "I want, I need, I, I, I" even in the Christian world. It's time to wake up and ask the Lord "what would you have me (or us, if married) do"?
Blessings!

Cat, Maryland

I think the Duggars are FACINATING! Although I do feel like she is pushing the envelope a little by having this baby so late in the game...who's to say that it won't have genetic problems. Not that it would phase them. I also wonder where they are going to put the new kid in their already packed house. Did you see the one where they finished their new house? Anyhoo...I don't think it's irresponsible to have that many kids. They take care of them, and really seem to enjoy them. Honestly, I would have 5, 6, or even 8 kids if I could. So I'm glad that they are able to have such a fun, loving, big family.

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